Stop Clicking Your Pen

I’m in a coffee shop trying to get some work done, and the woman next to me is clicking her pen maniacally. I’m losing my reason. What do you do with this? Microsoft public relations training–where they teach you to respond to even the most offensive question or trying situation with a smile and a cookie–did not address the freakish-pen-clicker scenario. I need to work! I have half of my coffee left! There are no other seats!

What would Robbie Bach do?

Robbie Bach probably got the deluxe PR training, where they DID cover this.

I’m losing my reason, people.

Saints preserve us.

Comments (18)

  1. Pedro says:

    Accidentally spill your remaining coffe down her back ….apologise , smile and offer to get her a cookie while you go and get some more coffe for you 🙂

  2. MrEdmundo says:

    I’m sorry, with the greatest respect if you want a quiet working area don’t work in a coffee shop.

    I have absolutely no sympathy for you.


  3. says:

    I actually did 90% of my study for my SA/EA exams in Starbucks because I couldn’t get my study on at home. Its strange but now every time I hear some Jazz music I think of WS2008..

    Next time buy her a nice Cookie and ask her to stop, she probably didn’t realise she was even doing it.

  4. Mike says:

    I believe it’s called the "library."

  5. Lee... says:

    Wise man says…

    Let the pen into your life. The pen is not asking to be clicked, it is just being a pen.

    You wouldn’t react this way if the pen was being used to write a letter.

    Your focus is weak, if all you can concentrate on, is the pen… 😉

  6. AspiringGeek says:

    Hmm-mm-mm…the "stimulus" is coming, yet my library doesn’t yet have coffee & cookies.

    If the cookie doesn’t work, try a cup of coffee.  If you’re feeling especially passive/aggressive, the coffee could "accidentally" spill on her papers, or–egad!–not too hot–on her lap.  Oh my, what would Dale Carnegie say?  Or Freud?

  7. says:

    Stand by, Jimmy May. A friend of mine at work just dropped off the Dale Carenegie mini-book to show me. It is literally the only piece of material on my desk, post-move. Let me tell you what he would say. According to points 15. and 16. I should, "Let the other person do a great deal of the talking" and "Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers." According to points 19. and 20. I should "Appeal to the nobler motives" and "Dramatize my ideas." Hmmm. I add my own point to his mini-book, point 42. "Smile a lot, and trade the person their pen for a cookie."

  8. AspiringGeek says:

    Holy correlated wait stats!  Now that we know what good ol’ Dale would do, it sounds like I need some serious therapy.  I’ll let you know what my Freudian disciple has to say during this week’s appointment.  In the meantime, I’ll keep myself on a short leash.

    BTW, I invite all y’all to check out my delivery of this spring’s Commencement Keynote to the local ITT campus.  It was quite an honor.  Mr. Carnegie *and* MS certification played important roles:

  9. Alice says:

    Give her a non-clickable pen, when you get the clickable one away from her (such as by cookie trade). Otherwise she might just pull another clickable one out of her bag if she still needs to write.

  10. Alice says:

    PS: For PR bonus points, give her a Microsoft promo non-clickable pen. 😉

  11. says:

    This is why they invented the iPo… errr… sorry… I mean Zune.

  12. @foreachdev says:

    You walk over ask politely to borrow their pen. Look at it like a circus freak. Say, "Hmmm how to fix this. Ah.." snap in half with a look of glee. Hand it back politely and say, "There it shouldn’t click anymore." Smile and walk away.

  13. Kevin says:

    That’s so mean.

    Besides, there’s a good chance that she’s obsessive compulsive, like me.  That’s why I don’t have clickable pens.  Of course if she is, she’ll just move on to something else if you take the pen away.  I frequently:

    1.  Click my fingernails

    2.  Twirl my moustache (doubt this is an option for her)

    3.  Hold a USB stick in my hand and remove/replace the cap repeatedly with my thumb (makes a nice clicking sound).

    And so on…

  14. says:

    Kevin, I would snap your moustache in half with a look of glee.

  15. Ann says:

    That’s a mighty powerful glance, to snap moustaches like that.

  16. says:

    Ann, my look of glee is like a throwing star in the hand of Chuck Norris. I’ll snap that shit right off! Don’t sleep.

  17. WallyTgoat says:

    Rainman style…

    (nodding up and down)"Zune, definitely zune,"

    (shaking side to side) "no…. iPooed"

    (nodding again) "yes, zune, definitely zune…"

  18. WallyTgoat says:

    Rainman Style

    (Nodding vigorusly) "Zune, definitely zune" (Shanking nead side to side)"no… No iPooed"

    (Nodding again) "yes, zune, Definitely zune…"