Fashionable PCs? How about...?

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While I'm not opposed to sleek, sexy computing power, there are other priorities that I'd like addressed...

Typical consumers simply purchased their devices out of necessity, but the scales are beginning to tip with demand growing for hardware that performs well, but looks good at the same time. As the form factor of computers evolve to be more attractive, they are transitioning from being the eyesore in the bedroom to the centerpiece of the living room.
Microsoft: The future is in fashionable PCs (BetaNews.com)

I don't mean to go off on a rant here (with apologies to Dennis Miller), but... I'd like a PC that:

  1. Really works like a pad of paper and a pen (i.e. won't boil my eggs if I happen to set it in my lap, if you know what I mean)
  2. Can be viewed easily in direct sunlight (and doesn't require juice just to keep the screen on while I'm reading)
  3. Have a startup time that isn't measured in parsecs, glacial cycles or prehistoric epochs (I was kidding about parsecs; I know that's a measure of distance. Inside joke for Star Wars fans.)
  4. Has a battery life long enough work all day and get something useful done without recharging (Heck, my Windows Mobile 6 phone can't even do that!)
  5. Has a walking around weight less than my mountain bike (I've had to carry my bike uphill to the office, trust me when I say my Tablet PC weighs less.)

Maybe I'm just jaded and still angry that my fully-charged Tablet PC ran out of juice during a team meeting this morning that was less than 90 minutes, but... I'd like my wifi-enabled, quad-core, bubble ink Tablet PC with a side order of terabyte flash storage to go, please. Hold the extra old-fashioned RAM, spinny hard drive thingy and the obsolete spare batteries, if you would.