A modest proposal: Getting people to stop buying SUVs

I developed this modest proposal many years ago, but it looks like rising gasoline prices have done the job. But in case they don’t, here’s my plan. SUVs are classified as “trucks” for the purpose of C.A.F.E. regulations, and those regulations are more lenient on gasoline efficiency for trucks. As a result, the auto industry…

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A modest proposal: Solving the problem of traffic in Seattle caused by sporting events

Whenever there is a sporting event in Seattle, traffic is reduced to gridlock for hours both before and after the event. This affects not only the people attending the sporting event in question, but also people who get caught up in the traffic as a side-effect. To resolve this issue, I present this modest proposal….

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A modest proposal: Solving the problem of steroids in baseball

In recent years, the issue of steroids in baseball has been the source of much hand-wringing. Some people argue that steroids are ruining the game. Others say that you can’t go around trampling the Bill of Rights and punishing people for doing things that are perfectly legal anyway. To resolve this issue, I present this…

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A modest proposal: On allowing mobile phones on airplanes

Ever since the FAA decided to reconsider its ban on the use of cellular phones on airplanes during flight, there has been quite a reaction over whether this is a good thing. To resolve this issue, I present this modest proposal. Remember back in the days when smoking was permitted on airplanes? When you bought…

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