Microsoft-internal Chuck Norris facts

A colleague of mine forwarded me some status mail from his team's internal bug push. (This is a push to fix bugs, not a push to introduce new bugs.) Apparently, one of the ways the developers lifted the tension was to discover some new Chuck Norris Facts, two of which were shared in the status mail:

Chuck facts today:

Happy birthday, Chuck!

(Remember, don't let the facts get in the way of a good story.)

Bonus: Google-internal Chuck Norris facts.

Comments (11)
  1. Brian_EE says:

    Don't forget:

    Supercomputers were invented to try to calculate the awesome power of Chuck Norris.

  2. AC says:

    "Chuck Norris taught Raymond Chen Win32 programming." is really a nice one.

    Too bad Chuck Norris is such a … wait, that would be against the ground rules.

  3. mikeb says:

    No surprise – Chuck Norris also has the social skills of a thermonuclear device.

    Actually, Chuck Norris has many of the skills of a thermonuclear device.

  4. Alexey says:

    I always assumed Raymond was taught Win32 programming by Shaolin monks.

  5. Henning Makholm says:

    "Chuck Norris taught Raymond Chen Win32 programming."

    Wait, that wasn't Bruce Schneier?

  6. zachd says:

    I removed my formerly cherished Chuck Norris poster from the kitchenette after learning of his shenanigans.  To paraphrase Mssr Chuck Norris: 'our poster as we know it may be lost forever.'

    I did not realize that you knew him: I would have tithed it to you. :)

  7. Killer{R} says:

    Chuck Norris may write to upper 2GB from user mode, but he never did this. He simple modify memory direcly – by knocking DIMMs by his little finger.

  8. Miff says:

    Too bad Chuck Norris is actually an a***** IRL…

  9. JamesNT says:

    Chuck Norris doesn't use CTRL + ALT + DEL. He uses CNTRL + C + N.

    Chuck Norris does not require a paging file for crash dumps.  If his computer crashes, it gets dumped.  Therefore, his computer never crashes.

    Chuck Norris calculated the last Mersenne Prime.  He got tired of waiting on all those slow computers.

    Chuck Norris dictated to Raymond Chen the entire series on scrollbars on Raymond Chen's blog.

    All malware authors program their malware to never infect Chuck Norris's computer.


  10. Nathaniel says:

    OT: I never realized how much I depend on your time-related articles to remind me when DST comes around that I thought people were pulling my leg when they told me it was happening tonight. Whoops. :)

  11. cheong00 says:

    @mikeb: I was about to say that too. :)

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