The Double-E Half Hour of Pain

I'm pretty confident I'm going to regret this.

I have been goaded into The Double-E Half Hour of Pain, featuring Eric Gunnerson and The Fat Cyclist. Indeed, Mr. Cyclist has already started the trash talk.

My strategy will be to start slow and taper off. (Especially since it will have taken me about an hour and a half just to get to the starting point.)

I'll be the one in the black shorts and yellow shirt, with a heavy bicycle and a withered hand. (I just like saying "withered hand".)

Comments (4)
  1. Wayne says:

    Good luck, Raymond. I prefer the other zoo ride. The one in Seattle. It’s not nearly as steep. Much more pleasant.

  2. Steve Loughran says:

    A good hill clim race is all psychological, and you are dangerously close to playing to lose from the outset.

    Here are some tactics

    -ask open questions, not questions that take answeres like yes/no/0x34fe. You want to ask a question between breaths "what tyres have you been running this season" or "how do I consistently get the ipaddr of a laptop", where the answer will put the opponent into oxygen deprivation before they are half finished.

    -at the corners, stand up accelerate past people and get out of sight before you sit down and die. It destroys morale. "The armstrong gambit"

    -have a squeaky bike and sit at the back of the pack humming out of tune. Make no attempt to talk or attack. This is the Indurain approach.

    -before the right, start comparing the climbs to fractions of an alpe d’huez. Or say something like "you could fit six of these in before reaching the first cafe on Le Tourmalet". Dont state whether or not you’ve done these classic french climbs, just let doubt gnaw away at their self-confidence.

    -look pleased at the start of ever steep bit

    -try and actually enjoy it. it is meant to hurt, otherwise you aren’t doing it right.

    Steve ‘20% gradient is where the fun begins’ Loughran

  3. ChipH says:

    Wow, now I feel like a real wimp for wanting to ride over this this coming weekend.

    Good luck on your ride.

  4. bramster says:

    Steve Loughren:

    The best tactic

    ride beside someone.

    Look at them.

    after a while. . .

    Look at them again.

    (repeat as necessary)

    Then. . .

    ask "are you feelin’ okay?"

    wait 10 seconds

    put the hammer down!!!

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