Funny: Computer Tech Support Calls


CompBashThese “silly tech support calls” have been around in e-mails and online since the dawn of tech support.  They are always fun to read.  Here’s a list my sister sent me that I hadn’t seen yet.  Blogging e-mail funnies may be a bit out of character for my blog, but it is Friday and I’m in the mood for a good laugh.  How ‘bout you?


Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the Button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
Customer: No, wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry.... 

Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...

Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer:  Your left or my left?

Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates.

CompFix_ACustomer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it... 

Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.

Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.

Customer:  My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer:  No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back
Customer:  OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support:  That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work... 

Tech support: Your password is the small letter "a" as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars. 
 
CompFrenzyTech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
 
Customer:  I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
 
Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it? 
 
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine." 
 
And last but not least...
Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager"
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
CompTrashCustomer:  I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!



Want more?
Here are some Calls from Hell, Stupid People Call Tech Support, Stupid Tech Support Pt1 *Long*, AudioComedy: Funny Tech Support Calls, and more, and more, and google, and you get the point.

Comments (29)
  1. Dawn says:

    Hello sweetie!

    I love this list!  I even laughed out loud!  Thank you for bringing a smile to my day!

    -Dawn

  2. i am technical support in dell computer.i got cal.customer not able to start computer.told to customer the computer when without unplugging the power cord.customer screamed  and i closed the call

  3. Stuart says:

    Hitesh,

    I hope you talk better then you type when your supportig customers

  4. jockaroo says:

    ….love it.!!…..very funny, most real life situations are..!!

  5. poopoop says:

    i took a crap in my computer. the next day it was still there. about a month later it stop smelling. thank you norton

  6. DJ says:

    [00:49:58] Sam: Welcome to our site ! How can I be of assistance today?

    [00:50:02] Visitor: is it gonna rain today??

    [00:50:34] Sam: Not sure about that

    [00:50:50] Visitor: can u check the wather cause i gotta go to the beach

    [00:51:19] Sam: Sorry I can’t

    [00:51:28] Visitor: just turn on the tv and watch it

    [00:51:50] Sam: No

    [00:51:49] Visitor: yes

    [00:52:13] Sam: Never

    [00:52:28] Visitor: do it now

    [00:52:46] Sam: Why

    [00:52:49] Visitor: cause i gotta go to the beach

    [00:53:09] Sam: Then what

    [00:53:15] Visitor: eat ice cream

    [00:53:36] Sam: Then go

    [00:53:50] Visitor: have intercorse with my girl

    [00:54:07] Sam: Use Umbrella

    [00:54:10] Visitor: y is it gonna rain

    [00:54:36] Visitor: i thought it was gonna be sunny

    [00:54:56] Sam: now you got a answer of your question

    [00:55:00] Sam: That should be all]

    [00:55:04] Sam: Good bye

    [00:54:57] Visitor: good bye

  7. Neelesh says:

    read a funny computer blog here:

    its gets really funny from the second paragraph

    diaryst.blogspot.com/…/few-words-owner-of-retired-computer.html

  8. Jeff says:

    I am support agent for apple and some of the customer are ridiculous

    serial number can you read it phonetically

    w as is wonder if my boy friend is cheating on me right now .. customer cries..

  9. Jeff says:

    I am support agent for apple and some of the customer are ridiculous

    serial number can you read it phonetically

    w as is wonder if my boy friend is cheating on me right now .. customer cries..

  10. Ben Loop says:

    Harry, I want you to know how much I appreciate all the help you gave me but also for the kind of person you are. You were able to fix my computer and email after I had spent hours and several days with other technicians who were not able to fix it. Although it was not a simple job for you, you stayed with it until you had solved the problem. You are extremely competent and determined. I am sure if you had not taken on the problem of fixing it for me, it would not have been done I called you Thursday AM and YOU were able to fix it. I think WORLD TECH SUPPORT is the best online computer support org. As a person you are in a class by yourself. You care about helping people which results in your going over and beyond what most people would do. Not only do you help but you are kind and considerate—and patient. You are really one fantastic person—one in a million. I will never forget you and what you did in regard to the computer/email problem. Thanks. I do not have words to express my appreciation for what you did and who you are." – Ben

  11. computer support service says:

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  12. Not her says:

    user: The keyboard at one of the computers is not working. ( certain keys are stuck) i was drinking coffee and someone sent me something really funny and i spit coffee on the keyboard

    tech: Thats fantastic, I am glad you are entertained I'll get you another keyboard

  13. Jenifer Ansten says:

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  18. rozermartin says:

    Hahahahahah great one…… Well apart these if one is calling you as being some xyz brands and assure you fixing your computer then probably its not a legitimate company. As no company calls you. Customers have to call for getting fixes. How would any company get to know about what you system is going through.

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