To love or to be loved?

Epiphany’s often occur out of the purple! You just have this aha-ah! Moment and you realize that the whole cosmic world works in harmony – like clockwork! Although, when you watch and examine individual moments of the jewels in the clock they don’t make sense. Connect them and you can see the purpose of the greater goal! Whole vision! Yesterday, I had one such moment. Epiphany!

Like my title says, to love or to be loved has been a question on my mind since a long time. It all started when a friend of mine asked me this naïve question – Whom would you want to be with? Someone who loves you or someone whom you loved. In an ideal world, the answer would be very simple because love always is and should be a two way street. But, the problem is twofold, 1 – The world isn’t ideal and 2 – Love is seldom a two way street.

That simple question has been on the back of my mind forever! The answer seems to be situational and conflicting with my thoughts and emotions. Being a student of scientific thought, reason has always been my best friend in solving problems and this is one area where it’s failed miserably. When the heart and the mind think alike its perfect harmony – Symphony even; but the problem arises when the heart and mind don’t think alike – which then is pure cacophony. It’s stuff like this that often lead you into an epiphany.

Simple, plain daily events lead you to that Eureka moment! It suddenly will all make sense – Some events yesterday led me to conclude that it’s always better to be with someone who loves you more than you love them. (I know it’s a chicken and egg problem and that’s a different blog post for a different day!) The simplest analogy I can think of is a football coach and his team. During practice the coach yells, screams and beats the players spirits down. His only motive in all of this criticism is the hope of making each of his team members a star player. But once they are on the field, the coach never condemns them but instead cheers and applauds them. Especially, when the opponent team is at fault, and wrong the coach regardless of anything/anyone will stand by his team, and his team members. Why? Because, it’s His team and He loves his team. It’s just the right thing to do! When there is no love, there is no respect and without respect there is no love and such a relation is often a recipe for disaster. Because no matter what, in life, there will be times when you are wrong and it’s at times like this that you are looking for some support and solidarity from people whom you love. Regardless of the outcome, you just look for some support and don’t expect to be let down. Nothing hurts one more than being let down by the ones whom you love. But it’s also times like this that shows you who cares for you and who doesn’t! It’s a great litmus test! And if it’s people who love you, they support you and help you get thru the situation but later tell you what could’ve been done better (Post game talk by the coach in the locker rooms)! If it’s someone who doesn’t love you, then of course, they don’t have to stick by you, nor respect you! They are sure rightful like every other person in the street to point a finger at you and leave you on your own to defend! This – my dear friend, is whom you don’t want in life! Because, in life it’s always a great feeling to be loved and wanted. Someone who’ll stick by you thru your thick and thin and someone who’ll stand by you and help you thru it. If you have someone like that – look no further!

I am sure we are all blessed with someone like this – but, do we make them ours?

To be loved!

Quip:

Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.

--Robert Frost