Why the !@#!@@!$ can't i just download a simple installer for the C# express sku???

That's a question that I've heard a lot about recently.  It's even the #2 suggestion at LadyBug.  You asked, the setup team delivered.  You can now get simple single file installer for all of the express skus and the components that install with them.  The C# installer is here.  Enjoy :-)