Sometimes a little levity is all we need. I can’t claim credit, but I’ll play it back here. As read at the Tuesday morning meeting by Paul Scivetti…author unknown…Happy Holidays!
Twas the night before implementation and all thru the house
not a system was working, not even the mouse.
The programmers all hung by their tubes in despair,
with hopes that a miracle soon would be there.
The users were nestled all snug in their beds,
while visions of queries danced in their heads.
When out in the server room there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.
And what to my wondering eyes should appear?
but an alpha geek programmer with a six pack of beer.
More rapid than eagles, his programs they came,
and he cursed and he muttered and he called them by name!
On Update! On Insert! On Query! On Delete!
On batch jobs! On Closing! On functions complete!
His eyes were glazed over, his fingers nimble and lean,
from weekends and nights in front of a screen.
But with a wink of his eye and a twitch of his head,
soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
turning specs into code; then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger upon the "ENTER" key,
the system came up and worked perfectly.
The updates updated; the deletes, they deleted,
the queries inquired; the closings completed.
He tested each whistle, and tested each bell,
with nary a glitch; it had all gone so well.
The system was finished, the tested were concluded.
The last minute changes were even included!
And the users exclaimed with a snarl and a taunt,
"It’s just what we asked for, but not what we want!"