New Office Words for 2009


BLAMESTORMING.

Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a Project failed, and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER.

A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

TESTICULATING.

Waving your arms around and talking bollocks. 

SALMON DAY.

The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.

CUBE FARM.

An office filled with cubicles.

PRAIRIE DOGGING.

When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. (This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)

SITCOMs.

Single Income, Two Children, And Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids or start a 'home business'.

SINBAD.

Single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate.

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.

The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

ADMINISPHERE.

The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the 'adminisphere' are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.

404.

Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message '404 not found' meaning that the requested document could not be located.

OH - NO SECOND.

That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all').


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